Priorities

                What a strange word! What does it mean?  Aren´t words simply words and, it doesn´t really matter how long they are or how hard to remember or difficult to write or how deep their meaning is?

                This is just a joke to start with the right foot, to really understand what priorities are.  Because we think it´s wrong to joke.  It´s wrong to rest, it´s not right to take a break or to have fun or watch T.V., drink Pepsi, eat hamburgers or eat a snack at ten in the morning!  We have failed to understand what priorities are!

                Maybe we ALL know what priorities are when it comes to the word; but, do we truly know how to find out those things that should stand on the list of priorities?

                Priorities are different to every human being, for we are individuals that are unique.  Priorities are also changing.  They have to be readjusted every now and then, according to circumstances, to people related to them, and even to our own state of mind, our health, mood, ability or feelings!

                Therefore, priorities will always vary from person to person.  We cannot expect a woman to have the same priorities as a man;  a single person as a married one; a youngster as an elderly; a healthy one as a sick one, …

                So, where do priorities begin?  With our circumstances, our knowledge, our minds, our feelings, our desires, our needs, our material world, our spiritual world?

                What are priorities really?

              Let us start with the fact that we are alive.  Life is a gift that has been granted to us. Everyone´s first priority must be life. Let us leave this as a statement that will allow us to keep a context with a right perspective and purpose.

            As adults, life is understood correctly.  We have learned about the body, physics, chemistry, mathematics, philosophy, faith, etc.  Now we have to face responsibilities. It is here where priorities start to tremble and struggle. We are not life itself, we are part of life and belong to life. If we miss this truth, we will aim wrong and get unwanted results. We are the creation of God, not the Creators of life.

                Things that can make it hard to define what a priority is, are selfishness and pride; our unsolved past can also mean a very big problem; … whenever we face struggle around priorities, we have to stop and take all the necessary time to do a test about our self.

1.       Who am I?

2.       What do I do?

3.       What do I think that I have to do?  What do I know that I have to do? Where are my feelings standing on the way of the reality I am responsible for?

4.       How can I be faithful, if I am not all right?

5.       Make a plan for things to work out fine for everyone.

There is the body, there is the soul, there is the material world, and all these things go round in ways we CANNOT control!  What we have to do is learn to deal with that. Sometimes we need, some other times we are overflowing, full of desire to give away and share, help and be there.  But at other times, we need to receive, even to ask, and even to stop, if we don´t get what we asked for!  This has everything to do with priorities.

Having understood that I am not life, but part of it, I have to see to it that LIFE is flowing and present and protected where I stand.  I must be careful not to fall in the trap of making myself the priority, opening the door to selfishness and cutting my connection to life, without even being aware of it. If life is all right, I can be all right. If I am not all right, life will see to it that I am all right, because I have access to it; I am part of it; I belong to it! 

 If I see to it that life, that is under my responsibility, is all right, I will always be able to go back to life, no matter at what stage, or how, or with who, … and adjustments will be made with no effort, in a smooth, natural way, full of freedom, peace, strength, dignity and happiness; for there has been no rupture between life and me!  But, if I concentrate on myself and lose sight of life, I might not be able to get back in time. I might be left behind.  And even if I achieve to reconnect, it may be very unpleasant and painful, and things that should not have been lost, might be lost forever!

    Thus, we could say that health must be a priority.  Wellbeing must be another one. We have to know what makes us healthy and glad (happy). We have to get to know ourselves as well as we learned about reading and writing at school, or about science or geography or music. As well as we know by heart the things we love and respect!  Our second priority, after life, must be: knowing ourselves.

               As long as we don´t know ourselves our priorities will prove themselves wrong, but even this fact will help us face the fact that we don´t know ourselves as much as we need to.

                Priorities should never be defined around money, or possessions, or  pride.  People who live like this are people who should be ashamed to use words and vocabulary; yet, vileness uses appearances and loves to boast and show off, pretending to be and have everything it is not and never will be, and will never have.  We have to find our dignity, before we can define our priorities in life.  Once that has been achieved, we can continue protecting our integrity and seeking happiness through faithfulness.

                Happiness is an excellent help to confirm that our priorities are right.  People who are happy  very often wake envy, because everyone wants to be happy; yet, achieving happiness might not be that easy. Let us turn it around and consider that envying someone can help you have courage and enthusiasm to work your own happiness.

                  Lacking happiness may show that our priorities are wrong. We have been taught that God comes first, but we don´t really know who God is. If we love ourselves, we will be able to know that we have found God, for God loves us.  As we love ourselves, we will understand better who God is, and this truth will allow us to live better. We will be setting things right all the time, achieving more and more the things we set out to reach, without having to struggle with guilt, doubt or fear.

                So, whenever we lack happiness, let us start by taking a look at our priorities; it may very well be that something isn´t working right there.  This is the purpose of this essay.  Once we´ve made sure the problem does not lie there, we can continue looking in other places.

                 Once our priorities are right, we avoid pain; and we are also willing to face any amount of pain in our way, for we have decided to get where we want. Our identity and our priorities always go together. If priorities are not bound to our identity, they are wrong. We cannot be in control, and we will fail to prevent any harm, failure, deception, frustration, etc.  Nobody can be in control of life, but everybody should be in control of their own lives. If we put this principle to work, life will be so much easier and fairer to everyone. 
 

  As long as we are bound to who we are, we will grow, even through times of defeat, adversity, struggle, difficulty, etc. Our identity and priorities won´t be in conflict because of the circumstances, but circumstances will work in our favor.  Things that ought to be adjusted, changed and even thrown away, rejected or forgotten, may be defined at times like this, thanks to our clear view of who we are and want to be. How we manage our priorities will depend on who we are and not on what we do.  Our priorities will keep us aware of where we are standing and of who we are; and who we are will keep our priorities right and working for us.  This will function, because of life itself; because we don´t force things, don´t ignore reality and don´t fear the truth.

                Thus, being that our priorities will always stand around who we are, we will always have to see to it, that we are all right.  We can´t live expecting others to make everything right for us, nor will we close our eyes and deny what´s going on.  We won´t sit or lean back or lay down, breathing in deeply, sighing and dreaming, until we know we have been faithful and the sky won´t fall down on us!  We should, therefore, make a list of every single thing that makes this possible.

1.        God

2.        Myself

3.        My body

4.        My soul

5.        My things

6.        My responsibilities

   (This list is just a suggestion; an example; not a must.  It may be that it meets your needs.) According to my maturity, age, experience, circumstances, etc. things will be more or less difficult; more or less pleasant; more or less adequate and right for some.  It´s only living, as we already stated, that we will learn to manage our priorities in an adequate way.

  To each number, many things have to be added:  To #1. Prayer; reading the Bible, obedience, etc.  To #2. Working on my self-esteem. To #3. Drinking enough water; see to it that I don´t get cold.  To #4.  Pay attention to not resenting when people don´t treat me the way I believe I deserve to be treated, etc. To #5.  Clean my room every Wednesday.  Etc.

This is a clear example of how we have to see our lives as a whole, yet, separating the different parts that belong to it, so that we can take good care of every one of them and receive the benefits.

It´s part of the priorities to see things as immediate.  We don´t have to be worried about the future.  We don´t have to be fearful.  We have to know that God works for us and has plans of blessing for us and won´t forsake us!  We have to walk, not run; we have to plan, not fear; we have to understand, not guess; we have to live, not worry or lie.  Priorities are exactly that which allows us to live with peace, without struggling, without anxiety, without danger and unexpected unpleasant surprises.  We have to be careful not to be unrealistic and put too much on our lists, for it is very easy to write things down; but let us remember, this is a list of the things we will be putting our minds and hearts to, even our budgets; so, let us keep it real and be patient and humble, as well as diligent and faithful.

Let us consider that priorities will help us examine ourselves again and again; and find things like selfishness or pride inside of us, even though we may have already dealt with them, and believed to have gotten rid of them. We just have to keep honoring the truth and be honest and faithful all along the way; this way, we make sure that happiness won´t leave us, for we have not cheated.

  When we achieve to set our priorities right, we have managed to be in control of our lives, and we can anticipate things we don´t want, and do something about them.  We can rearrange priorities again and again in order to keep our happiness, to protect it and even defend it.  And we can also be open to more or different happiness, through different experiences, knowing that we are not life, but part of it, and life may offer us things we cannot imagine or think of.

  Life will always be beautiful and sweet, even if we have to face adversity at some time.  Life is challenging sometimes; but it´s also inviting, exciting, promising, rewarding.  Life is a gift, and we are meant to understand it, cherish it and participate, willingly, intelligently and thankfully.

Let us take some time to go through our lives and set priorities right.  It doesn´t matter if we find out that we have to give up some things, being that we may understand that we have been managing more than what we really can.  Let us be humble to face the truth, let us be courageous and faithful, and let us adjust our lives to the truth, and open our arms to the prizes we may have been missing!

  Very often, we miss to aim right, because we do not see what we are aiming, we just think that we do.  Our wrong thinking leads us wrong , but we trust our thoughts and feelings blindly.  Now we know another part of the truth and can rely on it, no matter where our feelings or thoughts may be still standing wrong. As we walk, we will get more and more excited with the idea of being better, living better, having more happiness and achieving more in life. Let us enjoy this knowledge as we put it to practice, and let us share with others the wonder of looking in the right direction and aiming at the center of that which we want to be ours!

Many blessings!

Associated blogs:  "Envy";  "Happiness"